[Column] Going home

[Column] Going home



I sat down on the bench.
12/15/2011, I was on the way to Narita airport.
My mom came to the station to see me off but noticed that I didn’t have a belt to lock my suitcase, she rushed to a near convenience store to buy something to tie my suitcase.

Coming to the last moment, I found her panicing to be obsessed with trivial thing.
Me, I was still sick. couldn’t stop coughing, was still feverish and couldn’t concentrate on things, but was in the uplifting feeling.

I looked around the station. I had been using the station since I was 11 years old to go to a cram school, junior high school, high school and work. (went to uni from another station)
The bench, vending machine, advertisement, houses and buildings, I was familiar to all of those things. I knew I would have a day to break down to have left all those things behind.
The higher the mountain is, the deeper the valley is. Though I was in the uplifting feeling, I tried to flatten my mood. Stay chill, do only what matters. Don’t give an emotional meaning to anything so I won’t miss them so much. Living, this is the only reality, the source of every kind of value.

My mom came back with a funny vinyl string. I promised her to tie my suitcase with it later.
Wind blew. It’s just a station. I authorize myself. I won’t be dramatic.

Fortunately train came shortly. Doors opened. Almost nobody got off.
She said take care. I was, so are you.
I struggled to take my suitcase on the train. I think I saw her over the window.

The train started moving.
On the train, there was nothing new but my suitcase. I didn’t even say long goodbye to most of my friends or family members. I wanted to leave like I went to a near convenient store. Actually, this is just the matter of how long you are stuck in the airplane, right ?

The train got into a tunnel and I saw myself in the window. This is me people see.
I was sitting with my legs stretched. Am I trying to make my legs look longer ? The seat is too hard to sit for 2 hours. The advertisements are cheesy and boring. Everybody looks dead as zombies.
Slashed everything so I won’t miss them.

I went in the opposite direction from going home. Now that is not my home. My home is in me, so I won’t need to go home forever.




Français :

[Édito] En rentrant à la maison


[Column] Going home

Je me suis assis sur le siège.
15 décembre 2011, J’étais en route vers l’aéroport de Narita.
Ma maman est venue à la gare pour me voir mais elle a remarqué que je n’avais pas de sangle pour fermer ma valise, elle s’est ruée au magasin le plus proche pour acheter quelque chose qui puisse ceinturer ma valise.

Arrivant au dernier moment, je l’ai vue paniquer, obsédée par des choses triviales.
Moi, j’étais malade. ne pouvant pas arrêter de tousser, toujours fiévreux et incapable de me concentrer sur quoi que ce soit mais avec le sentiment d’avancer.

J’ai regardé les alentours de la gare. J’y venais depuis que j’avais 11 ans pour aller à une école de bachotage, en junior high school, en high school et au travail. (j’allais à l’université à partir d’une autre gare)
Le siège, la machine vendant les tickets, les pubs, maisons et bâtiments, toutes ces choses m’étaient familières. Je savais que j’avais un jour pour m’effondrer d’avoir laissé tout ça derrière moi.
Plus haute est la montagne, plus profonde en est la vallée. Bien que j’étais dans ce sentiment de progression j’ai essayé d’aplanir mon humeur. Rester froid, ne faire que ce qui importe. Ne rien donner d’émotionnel à quoi que ce soit pour qu’ils ne me manquent pas trop. Vivre, c’est la seule réalité qui tienne, c’est la source de toute valeur.

Ma maman est revenue avec une amusante corde en vinyl. Je lui ai promis d’en entourer ma valise avec après.
Le vent soufflait. C’est juste une gare. Je m’autorise. Je ne serai pas dramatique.

Par chance, le train est rapidement arrivé. Les portes se sont ouvertes. Pratiquement personne n’en est descendu.
Elle m’a dit de faire attention. Je le faisais, comme toi.
J’ai bataillé pour mettre ma valise dans le train. Je pense que je l’ai vue par la fenêtre.

Le train a démarré.
Dans le train, il n’y avait rien de neuf à part ma valise. Je n’ai même pas fait de long adieu à la plupart de mes amis ou à ma famille. Je voulais partir comme j’allais à un magasin. En fait, c’est seulement la question de savoir combien de temps on reste dans l’avion, n’est-ce pas ?

Le train est entré dans un tunnel et je me suis vu sur la fenêtre. C’est comme ça que les gens me voient.
J’étais assis les jambes tendues. Est-ce que j’essaye de faire croire mes jambes plus grandes ? Le siège est trop dur pour rester assis pendant 2 heures. Les pubs sont nulles et ennuyeuses. Tout le monde a l’air aussi mort que des zombies.
J’ai tout cassé, alors je ne leur manquerai pas.

Je suis parti dans la direction opposée à celle de ma maison. A présent ce n’est plus ma maison. Ma maison est en moi, alors je n’aurai plus jamais besoin de rentrer à la maison.

  1. Lori,

    My home is in the Lower Peninsular of Michigan, far north along Lake Michigan; it is very cold today and there is at least 20″ of snow and more to come.

    Perhaps this does not compare to your loss of family, friends, familiar things and a homeland that you were raised in and loved. But, in many ways we have lost a great deal in our perception of our nation, its relationship to the world community, and the freedoms that we have taken for granted. Everything that we were taught to believe in has been false; some of us were more aware than others. Some stubbornly refuse to awaken to reality, preferring to believe that nothing has changed and nothing is wrong. The fuel that feeds the fire of the American Dream is provided by the mass media under the direction of the government and the three families that have a monopoly in fixing the information that goes into newspapers and magazines, talk radio and television. But there is an underlining social consciousness that recognizes those changes and the danger that the world faces.

    I have just looked at the information regarding the Bayou Corne, Louisiana “sinkhole” which is better defined as a salt dome collapse which now numbers seven. Like the nuclear nightmare of Fukushima,the problems of the sinkhole are increasing and spreading to other locations around the state, with no resolution. Bayou Corne’s salt caverns have been leaking toxic chemicals and radioactive waste for the past year and more; the government knew that problems existed but chose to stay silent. The private wells and the Mississippi aquifer that serves @70.000 people have been contaminated with those toxins and radioactive waste. And unbelievably, there are plans to create more salt caverns. The information that I read, if true, warns of a major event with an uptick of the seismic monitors and increased gases, such as methane. Reports of Americans in the beginning stages of radiation sickness has not been many at this time. If only people could see the radiation that has entered our food supply through the movement of the airstream from Japan to the US and our air, water, soil and the inevitable entrance of our food supply. The plants of the US are just as guilty of spreading radiation, they are old and not maintained…and they leak.

    The information that we have about Fukushima and its people, as well as, the information about Louisiana comes to us from the Internet and people outside of the US. You have sacrificed everthing to provide information about Japan and the nuclear nightmare, knowing that it needed to be done from outside of your homeland. I acknowledge that sacrifice and the importance of the work that you do. Thank you, Lori. (Michele)

  2. People who know Jesus, know that they are just passing through this world, and it is not their true home. This life is very important, and we are to live it out to the extent of the days God appointed each of us long ago, but this life is not all there is. God has things for us to do while here, and growth and development and learning for us to undergo. This world is messed up and has been from the moment Adam chose to go his own way from God. In fact, the world system is organized against God. Real home, is a place where God wants us all to be, and God has provided for this by coming to earth in the form of a man, and dying a substitutionary death to pay the penalty for each of us for choosing to go our own way. Real home, has no satanic angelic activity behind the scenes, has no world system organized against God and truth and justice, and there is no sin nature possible there to be a hindrance to people. Real home is a real place, filled with God’s powerful, intense, genuine, sincere, unconditional loving kindness and care, where each person is loved as if they are an only child.

    1. Then JB, all is well in the land of the American Dream because we keep hearing that this is a Christian nation of American Exceptionalism.

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About this site

This website updates the latest news about the Fukushima nuclear plant and also archives the past news from 2011. Because it's always updated and added live, articles, categories and the tags are not necessarily fitted in the latest format.
I am the writer of this website. About page remains in 2014. This is because my memory about 311 was clearer than now, 2023, and I think it can have a historical value. Now I'm living in Romania with 3 cats as an independent data scientist.
Actually, nothing has progressed in the plant since 2011. We still don't even know what is going on inside. They must keep cooling the crippled reactors by water, but additionally groundwater keeps flowing into the reactor buildings from the broken parts. This is why highly contaminated water is always produced more than it can circulate. Tepco is planning to officially discharge this water to the Pacific but Tritium is still remaining in it. They dilute this with seawater so that it is legally safe, but scientifically the same amount of radioactive tritium is contained. They say it is safe to discharge, but none of them have drunk it.


February 2013